Better Caught than Taught - Lessons from Dad

I found a quote this week that reminds me of my dad, "He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it." ~Clarence Budington Kelland
Growing up we didn't schedule family meetings, we called it supper. He didn't schedule times to be together, we went to baseball games. My dad didn't tell me I had to help others he just helped. He didn't tell me I had to go to church he just went. He didn't tell me I had to love God, he just loved God. He didn't tell me I had to love the Bible, he just read it and taught it. He didn't tell me to love my family, he just loved his. I figure, the best things in life aren't taught there caught.

Love you Dad,
Randy

Father's Day Sermon

When I share these notes they are often unedited. Straight from my notes. They are not meant to be published in a book just used to share the truths of God's Word. I hope they are a blessing.

I have some words of advice for Dads in different stages

• Not even a dad yet – grow in character now
• New dad – Patience
• Dad of Teenagers – Rolaids
• Dad of College age – second job
• Dad with grown kids – change your phone #

The Book of James gives us some better advice on being a Great Dad.

It starts with wisdom.

1. Wisdom is action and attitude

James 3:13 Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show it by his good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom.

• Actions - Good life – deeds done
• Our works show our hearts
• Do good things for your family and others
• Attitudes – humility
• The opposite of humility is pride
• Putting ourselves ahead of others
• Looking down on others

We need wisdom in actions and attitudes.

2. worldly Wisdom brings disorder

James 3:14 But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth.

James 3:15 Such "wisdom" does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, of the devil.

James 3:16 For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice.

• This is tough in our society where everything is based on competition
• House we live, car we drive, job we have
• We are pushed in the direction, bigger, stronger, faster
• If you won’t do it someone else will and they will get the promotion and you won’t – even though you are more qualified
• But wisdom says I won’t envy others and what they have – I will be thankful for what God has given me
• Selfish Ambition
• Ambition in itself isn’t bad
• Ambition pushes us to be better
• Someone without ambition the Bible calls a sluggard
• Selfish ambition is the desire to live for one’s self and no one or nothing else, only for what we can get out of it.
• Get ahead no matter the cost –
• Specifically – cost to relationships
• In context self-ambition involves – rallying others to your side to get your own way
• Church – instigator forcing people to choose sides
• Home – trying to make everyone see things your way

This wisdom although popular in the world is not to be part of our lives as Christians at home or in the church.

It comes not from God but from below.

And its outcome is always the same – disorder

• At home
• At church

Watch when things get out of balance – when things are in disorder

• Get the root cause and you will find bitter envy – selfish ambition
• I want what others have
• I’m going to get it no matter the cost

3. Godly Wisdom brings Peace

James 3:17 But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.

• Pure – integrity – completeness – not hypocritical - honest
• Peace-loving - some people just love to fight or stir up trouble – be peaceloving
• Considerate – putting others first
• Submissive – willing to yield – flexible
• Full of Mercy – gracious forgiveness
• Good fruit - will naturally be produced as we sow these other traits
• Sow something bad – reap something bad
• Sow good – reap good
• Impartial
• Not favoring one side over the other
• Sincere
• Genuine – The real deal

James 3:18 Peacemakers who sow in peace raise a harvest of righteousness.

• The worlds wisdom leads to Disorder
• Godly Wisdom leads to peace and righteousness

How do we get this type of Wisdom?

4. Godly Wisdom comes from Prayer

James 4:1 What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don't they come from your desires that battle within you?

James 4:2 You want something but don't get it. You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want. You quarrel and fight. You do not have, because you do not ask God.

• You have not because you ask not
• If you ask you will have.
• This is not talking about material things
• It is talking about wisdom
• James 1:5 If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.

Dad’s – God is on your side

He knows what it is like to Father children who don’t obey

To have children that won’t listen and don’t learn.

He knows – He Cares – He can help.

Ask – Why is it so hard to ask for help sometimes?

Can it be that pride sometimes hinders our best judgment

Humbly ask God for help and he will give it.

Lord,
I need your special care.
Like your earthly father, Joseph,
I want to do God's will,
even if I may not always understand.

Make me gentle and selfless
in the care of my family and children;
help me guide them in the toils and troubles,
the happiness and wonders of this life.

Like my Father in heaven,
make me strong in love and forgiveness
for those you entrust to my care.

No one can do these things rightly, Lord,
without your constant help and boundless mercy.
Be with me always,
and may I come to you in heaven,
and all my family with me.
Amen.

God bless our dads

In memory of Rose Livoti

Last week we lost a great saint of God. Rose was a part of this church for 77 years. In the days of instant everything it seems as if 77 years is an eternity.
I want to share some of the thoughts I shared at her funeral.

This is a day I have not been looking forward to. Sister Rose is so important to me and this church we never want to say good-bye. She lived the life I would want everyone to live. She loved Jesus and Jesus loved her. From this foundation of love she loved others. Oh how she loved. She loved everyone and everyone loved her. How could you not love Sister Rose?

She loved the Word of God. She would read the Bible everyday. She could quote it and she would tell others what it said. She loved coming to Bible Study and sharing great insights into the Word of God. But most of all she lived it.

She loved to Pray. I believe she has prayed for everyone in this room by name more than once. I honestly don’t know what I would have done without her daily prayers. When Rose said she prayed she meant she PRAYED. I know God heard and answered her prayers. We mentioned on Wednesday Night another aspect of prayer, what didn’t happen because she prayed. How we were protected and provided for because she cared enough about us to pray for us by name.

She loved her church. She was there whenever she could be. She never missed if her health permitted. She sat right there every service. Even when it was hard for her to walk she would make her way to her spot. She was a member for 75 years. She loved the people, she loved her pastor and her pastor loved her.

She loved to give. She would have given more if she had more to give. She reminded me of the woman Jesus commended above the wealthy at offering time, she gave all she had to God.

Yet in all of this there is a larger lesson to be learned from her life. She did not do all these things to get right with God she did those things because she was right with God. Herein lies the difference between Christianity and all other religions. Religion teaches that we must do something to get to God. Christianity teaches we could never do enough to get to God and so God came to us in the person of Jesus. Religion teaches we must give God gifts. Christianity teaches us he has given the ultimate gift. Religion teaches we must earn his love. Christianity teaches us he loves us first. Religion teaches us it is our good works. Christianity teaches us it is His Grace.

Religion has two by-products: pride or despair.

Pride comes when we think we have done enough that God will surely accept us when we die. Phrases like this are used, well I never killed anyone. I tried to help other people. At least I’m better than so and so. I am a good person. The problem is none of us are good.

Here is what the Bible says, Rom 3:10 As it is written: "There is no one righteous, not even one; Rom 3:11 there is no one who understands, no one who seeks God.

Rom 3:12 All have turned away, they have together become worthless; there is no one who does good, not even one."

Rom 3:20 Therefore no one will be declared righteous in his sight by observing the law; rather, through the law we become conscious of sin.

Rom 3:23 for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,

Religion can lead you to believe, “I am good.”

Rom 3:27 Where, then, is boasting? It is excluded. On what principle? On that of observing the law? No, but on that of faith.

Rom 3:28 For we maintain that a man is justified by faith apart from observing the law.

There is another outcome to religion, despair. Despair is coming to the realization we are not so good. We have made mistakes. We have chosen to do what is sinful. Despair sets in when we believe we have done so much wrong God would never welcome us to heaven. Religion leads others to believe “I am too bad.”

Rom 4:24 but also for us, to whom God will credit righteousness--for us who believe in him who raised Jesus our Lord from the dead.

Rom 4:25 He was delivered over to death for our sins and was raised to life for our justification.

Here is Christianity in a nutshell. I am not good. But God is. I couldn’t get to Him. He came to us. He lived a perfect life. He died on the cross in my place. Through faith and repentance we receive Jesus’ righteousness (rightness). Christianity is the most unfair exchange in all of history. We give him our sin and he gives us his Grace.

This is why although Rose was one of the greatest people I have ever known her right living was not enough to get her into heaven. What got her into to heaven was the very fact she understood she was not good, she was a sinner in need of a Savior.

We have spoken of the by-products of Religion – Pride or despair.

What then is produced by Christianity?

Rom 5:1 Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ,

Rom 5:2 through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God.

Peace – calm assurance that we have a right relationship with God

Grace – Right standing with God we haven’t earned or deserved

Joy – fruit of a right relationship with God. It is a delight of the mind arising from the consideration of a present or assured possession of a future good.

Hope – and assurance that what he has promised will happen

I told a story when I first came to Malaga that Rose loved and wanted me to share at her funeral. The story goes a lady who called her pastor to her house. She had just received bad news from the doctor and wanted to let the pastor know and begin making arrangements for the funeral service. They talked about songs and scripture and then the dear saint made a strange request, she asked to be buried with a fork in her hand. The pastor was puzzled as he had never heard of a request like this before. She explained to him how many church dinners she had been to and at the best dinners when someone was cleaning up the plates they would say, “keep your fork.” That meant dessert was coming. It meant the best was yet to come. Rose wanted you to know that on the day she past she received the best God has to offer, heaven. She died trusting in Jesus. She lived trusting in Jesus and knowing the best was yet to come.

Peace, Grace, Joy, Hope this is what Christianity is all about.

How do we receive what Rose had? Not by working for it. Paul in Romans tells us.

Rom 10:9 That if you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.

Rom 10:10 For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved.

Rom 10:11 As the Scripture says, "Anyone who trusts in him will never be put to shame."

Rom 10:12 For there is no difference between Jew and Gentile--the same Lord is Lord of all and richly blesses all who call on him,

Rom 10:13 for, "Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved."

Have you asked for forgiveness? Have you received His Grace.

We love you Rose. We will miss you. We are happy for you but sad for us.